One Life to Live Transcript Tuesday 12/22/09


Episode # 10591 ~ Rockin' Around the Crisis Tree

Provided By Suzanne
Proofread By Kathy

[Knock on door]

Mitch: How lovely of you to visit me so late. Hmm. Especially considering your-- well, your delicate condition. You must be exhausted, not to mention terrified.

Stacy: Hmm. Terrified of what?

Mitch: Why, of little old me, of course. You've undoubtedly heard that I murdered Jared Banks.

Jared: Hi, Sparky.

Rex: Hey, Nattie. You okay?

Natalie: Yeah. Sorry. Recent-widow syndrome: Imagining dead husband all over the place.

Rex: I'm sorry. I was on my way to the carriage house and I saw you. I thought you might like some company.

Natalie: It's so late. You know, I'm sure Gigi's waiting for you at home.

Schuyler: Okay. Okay. Wow. Sorry. This is like, what, the third time I've lost my mind and gone all kissing bandit on you when it's not what you wanted or needed or asked for?

Gigi: Why don't you let me figure out what I want and need and am asking for?

Nora: How was Matthew? Did he have a lot of questions?

Bo: Hmm? Yeah. Ahem. He wanted to know why we were all staying here instead of the house.

Nora: Yeah. And Dani was a little weirded out, too. Here we told her that we were gonna have all this room, and she ends up back at the very hotel that her mother's living at. We told her she was gonna have a nice stable environment. I didn't have the heart to tell her that dear old Uncle Clint had pulled a shotgun on us after we admitted that we had fallen in love behind his back.

Clint: No, thanks. I mean, I appreciate the invitation, Kim, but I just don't think I'd be very good company.

Kim: Don't worry about that. We can just eat popcorn, watch a bad late-night horror movie, and just hang out.

Clint: "Hang out"? At your place?

Kim: Why not? Why should you be in that big old house thinking about your wife and your brother when you don't have to?

Clint: I'm gonna do some work, Kim. But thanks for the invitation. In fact, thanks for everything.

Nigel: About the occurrences here today, is there anything I can do?

Clint: No, Nigel. There's nothing to be done. It's over.

Nigel: I'm very sorry to hear that, Sir.

Clint: Yeah. So am I.

Bo: I don't get it. We decided to wait. We were gonna see how things played out with Dani. Then we would tell Clint.

Nora: I didn't tell him. I swear I didn't tell him. He already knew.

Bo: Yeah, but how did he know?

Nora: I don't know! I have no idea. I don't know. All I know is that after you and Dani and Matthew left, I went looking for him to tell him that I was home, and I found him--in bed with another woman.

Nigel: Are you in need of something?

Clint: Yeah. I need to get the hell out of here!

Nigel: Then allow me to assist you with a reservation. The Palace restaurant, perhaps?

Clint: Dinner is not what I'm after, Nigel.

Renee: Oh, Nigel, where is everybody?

Nigel: Madam, you're up.

Renee: Nigel, how long have you known me?

Nigel: Quite some time, madam.

Renee: And how many times have I told that when a man calls me "madam," it has a whole different meaning than the one you're after?

Nigel: So sorry, ma--ohh. I'm afraid I am not myself tonight.

Renee: You and me both. I thought that Nora and Matthew were coming back-- what is that doing out?

Nigel: I regret to tell you that Mrs. Buchanan and Mr. Matthew won't be living here anymore.

Renee: And the shotgun is out? Bo and Nora must've fallen in love again.

Bo: Clint was in bed with someone?

Nora: His assistant.

Bo: Sandra?

Nora: Oh, God, no. It was a younger, trampier piece of work that Clint hired to replace her. I thought he was sick--that's why he wasn't returning our calls and why he was in bed so early--until she came slithering out from underneath the covers. Hmm! Ohh. He was all like it's just another day at the office, you know? "Nora, dear, do you mind waiting outside while my whore gets dressed? And, oh, by the way, I know what you did last summer."

Bo: Oh, man. That must've been fun.

Nora: The fun was just beginning. After his slut left, he proceeded to tell me how they--how they got together. The first kiss was the--the night at the lodge before our wedding. How he--how he continued to marry me and make me believe that he was happy, and that he--he loved me. All the while, he was falling more deeply in love with her.

Bo: So this assistant let him use her to--to pay you back?

Nora: Hmm. It gets better than that, Bo. You see, Clint and Kim--

Nora: That's her name. Kim. Nice. Anyway, they--they weren't having an affair at all. They were just putting it all on for show so that I would know how he felt. And it worked.

Bo: I'm so sorry.

Nora: You know, it wasn't the--it wasn't so much the shock of seeing another woman in my bed. It was more the depth of the anger and the bitterness that was in Clint's eyes. And how much I hurt him by falling in love with you.

Schuyler: Do you think maybe we could start over? Like, hit the rewind button and just go back to the part where you said--

Gigi: No, we cant, Schuyler. We're past that: Redos, do-overs. You didn't trip and fall on my lips. You wanted to kiss me. And I--

Schuyler: And you didn't.

Gigi: I did not say that.

Schuyler: Yeah, but me putting the moves on you is--is kind of gonna complicate things.

Gigi: This whole situation's complicated.

Schuyler: Yeah, but it's not sleazy. Not yet.

Gigi: Meaning?

Schuyler: I--I want to be with you so badly, you have no idea. But you're still with Rex.

Gigi: I'm trying to figure it out, how I feel about him. Ohh!

Schuyler: I know how you feel about him. You love him. You share a child.

Gigi: And how I feel about you.

Schuyler: Well, you know what? You want me. But other than that, we don't know. And you cheating on Rex with me is not gonna help you figure this out.

Gigi: So what do we do? Go on a date?

Schuyler: Actually, I have a better idea.

Natalie: It's nights like this there are just so many memories. I mean, just a little over a year ago, Jared and I were camped out here trying to figure out how we were gonna take care of Bree and Chloe while Jessica was in the hospital. Yeah, we were so exhausted from the midnight feedings and the changing of the diapers and chasing Bree all over the house. But we were loving it, you know? It kind of made us wonder what it would be like to have kids of our own. And, you know, what--what's crazy is I started wishing that Jared got me pregnant. You know, like Jessica was when Nash died? Because I ju--I just want something of Jared to hold onto. I want his baby.

Rex: Is it possible you could be pregnant?

Mitch: It's good to have an ally. I believe you're the only one I have in this town.

Stacy: Me your ally? On what planet?

Mitch: Don't play games with me. I know my son impregnated you.

Stacy: Okay, everybody in this town knows I'm pregnant with Rex's baby.

Mitch: I also know that this baby is the only chance you have at winning Rex.

Stacy: Still not seeing how that makes me your ally.

Mitch: All right. You want Rex at any cost, so let's make a deal. You give me what I want, and I will make sure that Rex and you spend the rest of your lives together.

Oliver: Uh, where were you?

Ofc. Johns: I walked Mayor Lord to the elevator. I was just gone a few minutes.

Oliver: Okay, you're not supposed to leave Laurence alone.

Stacy: You can help me get Rex? How?

Mitch: I've been watching you. I know the extreme measures you have taken to steal my son's heart. I even know the lengths that you went to to procure the stem cells that saved my grandson's life.

Stacy: And you have a problem with that?

Natalie: Jared and I were waiting to start a family. So there's no way I'm pregnant unless there's some miracle or the birth control malfunctioned. So I have nothing left.

Rex: Nattie, you might not believe this now, but you've got plenty left. Okay? You've got this huge, big family that loves you. You have me.

Natalie: But now you're Jessica's blood brother.

Rex: And you're her blood sister. So do you know what that makes all of us?

Natalie: Screwed up? Connected to Mitch?

Rex: Family by blood and by choice. Best of both worlds.

Mitch: I admire your tenacity, Stacy. I applaud your insidious plotting. I even helped with your endeavor.

Stacy: That nurse. That--that weird woman that showed up out of nowhere with all that extra blood in case Shane needed it. Huh. She didn't just show up out of nowhere, did she? You sent her to me, right?

Gigi: We are in a cabin in the middle of the woods where no one can hear me scream. So what is your idea? Throwing a hockey mask on and chasing me around with that thing?

Schuyler: Gigi, you need to make this place feel more like home before--before Shane comes up. So what do you say? [Country accent] We head out into them there woods? We find us a perfect tree that we can cut down and decorate?

Gigi: Christmas tree?

Schuyler: [Normal voice] Yeah. Why not?

Gigi: I was totally wishing for one.

Stacy: You made sure I got that blood, didn't you?

Mitch: It hardly matters, does it? You allowed Rex to steal the blood right out of your hands.

Stacy: Ohh. He hated me more than ever after that.

Mitch: Yes, but now you're carrying his child, and he will cleave to you.

Stacy: I would love that more than anything. Why should I believe you when Rex doesn't want anything to deal with you?

Mitch: Yes, but remember he once felt the same way about you. And look where you are today.

Stacy: You're really creepy. You know that? So how do you know so much about me? What do you want from me?

Renee: The last thing I ever thought would happen is that Nora would cheat on Clint with his brother.

Nigel: Shattering.

Renee: You know, Clint should not be alone at a time like this. Do you know where he is? Nigel?

Nigel: I'm sorry, but I have even more disconcerting news to report.

Clint: I pulled a shotgun on Bo and Nora tonight.

Kim: You didn't...

Clint: Shoot? No, no. But, by God, I could have.

Kim: You are one crazy dude.

Nora: What a night, huh?

Bo: Do you think that Clint's assistant could've found out about us and then she told him?

Nora: I have--I don't know how she could've. I've never even seen this woman before. It doesn't matter how he found out. He found out. And his reaction was worse than either one of us even imagined.

Clint: The gun wasn't loaded. But in that moment--in that moment, I wanted to blow their heads off.

Kim: Who can blame you?

Clint: I can, according to Bo. According to Bo, there's no one to blame for all of this except me.

Nora: I knew Clint would be hurt and furious. But it's one thing to think about it, another to live through it. I was scared to death.

Bo: Clint never would've fired that gun.

Nora: But he wanted to. I could see it in his eyes. God. That's what I pushed him to: Jumping into bed with a flunky on the payroll, having him pull a shotgun on his brother. He's right. I have destroyed the family.

Clint: Maybe Bo is right. Maybe I never should've married his ex-wife to begin with.

Bo: We're not gonna do this. We both hate that we hurt Clint, but we're not gonna blame ourselves.

Kim: Hey, you can't blame yourself. You never know who you're gonna fall in love with.

Bo: We fell in love, Nora. Now, I don't regret it. Do you?

Kim: You fell for Nora. She played with your heart fast and loose. That makes her a fool in my book. Look, I know you're hurting, but she's the one who lost. I mean that.

Nora: I will never be sorry for loving you. Because I can't fight this. God knows I've tried.

Bo: I don't want to fight it.

Nora: But how do we get past the hurt that we caused your brother when he needed us the most? When his daughter was grieving for her husband?

Rex: All I want to do is help you.

Natalie: I know. And I wish you could. But you should go. Gigi is waiting for you at home.

Rex: No, she isn't.

Schuyler: I couldn't do it. I could not bring myself to make the first cut to that innocent little tree.

Gigi: I had no idea you were a tree-hugger.

Schuyler: I can't fish either. Road kill makes this grown man cry. And if a wildlife fund or a humane society calls me asking for money? Pfft. Forget it. I'll give them the shirt off my back.

Gigi: You know what?

Schuyler: What?

Gigi: I'm just realizing that our relationship has been all about Rex or Stacy or me, and I--I really don't know you at all.

Schuyler: Well, you know, some chicks dig mystery.

Gigi: I'm gonna dig finding out more secrets even bigger than the fact that you can't kill a fly.

Schuyler: Why would I care what idiot she slept with?

Kim: Because, you big dummy, it's you. You're the father.

Schuyler: Oh, I've got a few whoppers.

Gigi: Like what?

Stacy: Yeah, I've heard a lot about you, too. At least enough to know that having you on my side isn't necessarily a good thing.

Mitch: Yes, well, the game of telephone is over. So judge for yourself what you see and what you hear.

Stacy: I will once you tell me what your deal is.

Mitch: Rex has fathered a brand-new baby child, my own flesh and blood. Do you know what a gift that is?

Stacy: Yep. It's a gift, all right. I just don't know what that has to do with you.

Mitch: My daughter Jessica has shown me nothing but disloyalty.

Stacy: She's sort of a bitch.

Mitch: And Rex...

Stacy: Okay, look, if you think you're gonna take Rex off to some compound and stick him with 15 wives, think again, buddy.

Mitch: Who said anything about returning to my flock with Rex or you? It's your baby, my grandchild, that I want to take back with me.

Oliver: You left your post?

Ofc. Johns: So what? No one's in there.

Oliver: How do you know that?

Stacy: You want my baby? You want me to just give you Rex's baby?

Mitch: This baby is a fresh start for me, a new beginning.

Stacy: Of what?

Mitch: Neither Jessica nor Rex is interested in building my ministry or carrying on my work after I'm gone. But this new baby can be nurtured by me from birth, shaped and molded so that my rightful heir will continue my work after I leave this earth.

Stacy: Are you serious?

Mitch: Spare me the disbelief and righteous indignation. You don't want that baby. What difference does it make to you? That baby is a means to an end for you, just a way for you to keep a hold on Rex.

Stacy: And when you take it away, what hold will I have? Why don't you take my sister's little brat Shane? He's your grandkid, too.

Mitch: Shane is too old, and Rex has already poisoned him against me. I'm offering you my promise, my word. "In the beginning was the word, and the word was God."

Stacy: Oh, get to the point. Your word about what?

Mitch: In return for the gift of your baby, I will make sure that you share your life with Rex.

Stacy: Rex hates you more than he hates me. And what kind of guarantee can you give me?

Mitch: So you're considering it?

Oliver: Stacy? What are you doing here? This man is very dangerous. You have to go now.

Stacy: That's what I was just telling this creep. Stay away from me and my baby. I have to go.

Natalie: Wait a minute. Did something happen between you and Gigi?

Rex: No. We're good. We're great.

Natalie: Rex, come on.

Rex: Look, I'm not gonna put this on you.

Natalie: Look, I know that when I asked you to go out of town to help me find Jared, that you guys were going through kind of a rough patch. Did--did she leave you?

Rex: No, she didn't leave me.

Natalie: Then what happened?

Rex: Her friend, Schuyler, that helped get her through this rocky time.

Natalie: Oh.

Rex: So I--I told her that she--that we needed to take a breather so she could figure out who she wants to be with: Him or me.

Natalie: Have you lost your mind?

Schuyler: Oh-oh. Oh, no. No--

Gigi: Yes. Come on, truth or dare. What's one of those whopper secrets you're keeping?

Schuyler: You do not seriously expect me to play truth or dare with you.

Gigi: Either answer my question or head back out into the woods in nothing but a sock to cut down my Christmas tree. Which will it be?

Schuyler: I--I think we previously established that I can harm neither flora nor fauna.

Gigi: The truth it is.

Schuyler: I didn't like the idea of you being up here without a Christmas tree.

Gigi: Not budging, Joplin.

Schuyler: Gigi, if I told you everything there is to know, you would run screaming back to Rex.

Gigi: I already know that you were in love with my witch of a sister who has caused me more grief than any human being ever has. If I got past that, I can get past anything.

Schuyler: Hey. Look. The perfect tree.

Oliver: Hey. You seem upset. Did--did Mitch threaten you?

Stacy: No.

Oliver: Hey, you got to be careful, Stacy. He's--he's sick. And you've got that baby to think about.

Stacy: That's what I'm doing: Thinking about my baby.

Oliver: Listen, I don't mean to be--I don't know. I just--I feel sort of connected to you. That night that we spent together, when you took me home with you after Rodi's, my whole life was turned around. And I can't help but think that--you know, I mean if things had been even a little different, that--that could've been my baby that you're carrying.

Stacy: Right. Well, um, I'd better get home.

Nigel: I fear Mr. Buchanan is with his new assistant Kimberly.

Renee: Kimberly?

Nigel: A young woman from Las Vegas who maneuvered her way into the company by claiming Jared hired her before he died.

Renee: I haven't even met the girl, and already I want to slap her.

Nigel: Oh, that's not all. I have no doubt she's responsible for the news about Commissioner Buchanan and Ms. Nora coming out.

Renee: Young female from Vegas. Va-va-voom, I presume?

Nigel: If you find refuse appealing.

Renee: Mm-hmm. Yeah. I know the type. Ha ha ha. Back in the days when I was still in the game, I knew hookers with hearts of gold and hookers who sold their hearts and everything else for gold.

Nigel: I can assure you Kimberly is of the latter variety. What can we do about this--this...

Renee: Slut?

Nigel: Precisely.

[Music plays]

Kim: You know what? You're a great guy.

Clint: I'm old enough to be your father.

Kim: But you're not.

Clint: I got boots older than you. I should be going.

Kim: Right. You should be home in that stuffy old study of yours, and I should be out at some dance club with some young, creepy dude slobbering all over me. Is that it?

Clint: If that's what you want.

Kim: No, thanks. I had enough of that while I was st--

Clint: While you were what?

Kim: Uh, when I was... dating a younger guy--

Clint: Don't even bother.

Kim: Excuse me?

Clint: I had you checked out. Your résumé. It’s fiction. You were a stripper in Sin City.

Kim: So why didn't you fire me?

Clint: I didn't fire you because, well, I thought you'd come in handy someday. And you did. I liked having you in my bed tonight when Nora walked in.

Kim: I wanted to do that for you.

Clint: But I have several other questions that I'd like an answer to.

Kim: Shoot.

Clint: Did you actually have an interview with my son-in-law? And did Jared really hire you before he died? Or is that a lie, too?

Renee: This house is not going to seem like a home anymore without Matthew and Nora.

Nigel: Around this time I'd be making up a snack for young Matthew, helping him hide his Christmas presents for the family. Why did this have to happen?

Renee: Oh, Nigel, love is a runaway train. It waits for nothing and no one. Asa, you always believed that Bo and Nora would get together. You wanted it. Huh. But not at Clint's expense.

Nora: I got to find a place to live. We can't live in this hotel forever. Dani and Matthew need a home.

Bo: One step at a time, okay?

Nora: That's the problem. I--I don't have a clue what the next step is. God, I wish we could've controlled how Clint found out about this.

Bo: Yeah, but do you know what? He would've been hurt no matter what. And now it--it's out: We love each other. And to deny that would've hurt all of us, including my brother.

Kim: No. I never interviewed with Jared.

Clint: Okay. So my daughter saw right through you even in her grief. What else?

Kim: What do you mean?

Clint: You didn't stop with only one lie, did you? What else did you do?

Kim: Um, like, um--

Clint: Um, like pencil yourself into Jared's calendar, and then slip a bogus thank-you note into his mail?

Kim: Oh. Right. Right. That's what I was doing in his office. I wanted to make it look like we'd met. But I guess all I did was make you suspicious and Natalie want to poke my eyes out. Not that she didn't have every right to be mad at me.

Clint: Why did you do all of this? The private investigator said that you're not connected to anyone who's trying to harm or take over B.E. So why?

Kim: To meet you. Are you gonna fire me?

Stacy: Oh.

Kim: Oh, hi.

Stacy: God, I'm starving. You know what? I'm gonna--I'm gonna go get a bite to eat.

Clint: Don't--don't leave on my account. I'm on my way out.

Kim: Uh, you can spend the night if you want.

Clint: Might want to quit while you're ahead.

Kim: Got it. Get out! See? I'm a quick study.

Stacy: Is that your limo downstairs?

Clint: It is, yeah. Kim, thank you. I needed this.

Kim: Should I come by B.E. tomorrow?

Clint: Well, yeah. Of course. But the next time you tell your boss that you're gonna match him shot for shot, make sure you're up to the challenge.

Kim: I'm really sorry about your wife and your brother. It really sucks.

Clint: It does. It does.

Stacy: Holy crap, you work fast! Uh, do I even need to ask how it went?

Kim: You first. What happened with Mitch Laurence?

Stacy: Um, well, he promised me Rex.

Rex: I couldn't think of what else to do! Gigi has feelings for another man. They're not going away. How can I live with that? How can she?

Natalie: She's confused. I mean, maybe this thing with Schuyler's just a crush. It'll pass.

Rex: Okay. When?

Natalie: Life is too short for you just to let go of Gigi. Okay? You need to go after her and tell her that you love her, that you guys belong together. Because do you know how much I regret every second I didn't spend with Jared? Go get Gigi and bring her home.

Rex: How about I go pay the sitter, grab Shane, get a movie, and come back here? You could use the distraction, right?

Natalie: No. I'm okay.

Rex: You want to stay here and remember Jared?

Natalie: That's the plan.

Rex: I love you, sis.

Natalie: I love you, too, Rex. Gigi is still here, Rex. Don't let her become a memory.

Nora: I'm gonna go and check on the kids. And I've got to tell Téa that I've got Dani here at the hotel.

Bo: You're welcome to come back after that.

Nora: I think I'm gonna go to my own room and put my feet up and unwind. It's kind of been a crappy day.

Bo: You think? It's gonna be okay for all of us.

Nora: Really? When? Good night, Bo.

Bo: Good night, red.

Nigel: Mr. Buchanan.

Renee: Oh, Clint. There you are.

Clint: What? You need something?

Renee: Yes, actually. A gin rummy partner. Money says I've got a couple of good hands in me before I turn in. And Nigel has to polish the silver. What do you say?

Clint: Nigel, you are officially relieved of your polishing duties for this evening. Okay? You guys have fun.

Nigel: Sir, are you sure?

Clint: I'm sure, yeah. Oh, I saw the Christmas lights from outside. Beautiful job. See you in the morning.

Kim: Clint drank me under the table. When I was totally defenseless, he told me he knew everything: How I faked my resume, how I lied to get the job.

Stacy: And he still didn't fire you?

Kim: No. And if he didn't fire me, it means he wants to have...

Stacy: Well, yeah. I mean, come on. No kidding. He's a man. If sex is all he wanted, he could pay for that. But I don't know. To keep you around after he knew everything you did? I wonder what the catch is.

Kim: I was wondering the same thing about you and that Mitch Laurence.

[Mitch whistles]

Oliver: What are you so happy about?

Mitch: God has smiled down on me and rewarded me for all my troubles.

Oliver: Is that right? God--God rewarded you?

Mitch: Praise the Lord, my brood is growing. My son has created a child in my image.

Kim: You should look that gift horse in the mouth, girlfriend. If that nut job's gonna give you Rex, he's bound to want something big in return.

Mitch: My blood is coursing through my progeny's veins. Because I am--I'm alive inside that child. I can never die. No matter what, I will live on. I will live on there in the twinkle of an eye or the gesture of a hand, the music of a laugh. I'm sorry that you, as a homosexual, will likely never experience the delight of offspring. I regret that you--you can't be as happy as I am at this moment, Officer Fish. You'll never know this feeling, the--the joy of expecting a grandchild. Holding a piece of yourself, a miracle of immortality, the gift of life replacing life.

Jared: What's it say?

Natalie: I can't look.

Jared: Yes, you can. For me? Accidents happen. Maybe we slipped.

Natalie: Nope. We didn't slip. And now I have nothing left of you.

Jared: Yes, you do. You have memories, Sparky. And you always will.

Schuyler: It's like a star.

[Gigi gasps]

Schuyler: What's wrong?

Gigi: Look! It's snowing!

Schuyler: Oh, wow.

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