All My Children Best Lines Monday 8/18/08


Provided By Gisele

Adam: Well, if you refuse to vacate my table, then I will. Um, Colby, get away from this pathetic offspring of a fraud.

Pete: "Pathetic" is a little strong considering I withheld information about your daughter's crime.

Colby: You basically used it as blackmail to hang out with the cool kids.

Pete: Do you blame me? You're phenomenally cool.

Adam: You're phenomenally annoying.

Pete: I know. Let's talk about similar interests -- business.

Adam: Ah, you want to trade stock tips about -- that you picked up from your daddy's knee? Hmm? Oh, one of the best things Pete ever did -- one of the best deals was a two-bit squirrel he bought for his evening stew.

Colby: You mean old Palmer, not Pete.

Adam: No, Pete Cooney. Pete Cooney. The name that this boy's father ran from.

Pete: I know my Cooney heritage. My dad said you were the joke of Pigeon Hollow.

Adam: Why you rancid little --

Adam: Oh, you -- yeah, get me Palmer Cortlandt's room.

Pete: Ooh, ooh. My dad does not like to be interrupted.

Adam: Yeah, Cooney? Hey, if you can't keep your son away from my daughter -- or I swear I will take over Cortlandt Electronics and sell it for scrap. Watch it, you stupid excuse for a tycoon.

Adam: Well, come here, Romeo. Why don't you go tell your father?

Pete: I prefer to stay, sir.

Adam: "Sir" -- don't call me "sir," you piffling sycophant.

Pete: Ok, Adam.

Adam: I -- I will flay you alive!

Colby: Whoa, no! Now run, now!

Pete: Later, Juliet.

Kendall (to Trent, the Fusion bartender): It's all going to hell, all of it. But it's ok. Not this place. Your job is safe. Everything is good. All my businesses are fine, but the rest of it -- oy. Let me tell you. Ok. Listen to this. The man who is basically my uncle through Bianca, my stepfather through my mother, is now living it up with one of my mom's little ex-con buddies. Then, my best friend got locked in the bathroom with her ex-husband -- my ex-fiancÚ. But not with her very own, very new, very out-of-the-loop husband. And then my sweet, wonderful husband didn't want to hear that my ex-fiancÚ's wife is a complete and utter freak, and she just makes me want to cringe every time she opens her big stupid mouth. So, basically what I'm saying is, I need to vent. I really need to vent. I need to scream in a pillow and just let it all go. [Sighs] Or I need to be granted control of the entire universe and fix everything -- every single itty-bitty thing. All of that and world peace, too. I'm serious. I could do it.

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